


Stay. Sleep.

by mckvch (RaiseYourVoice)



Series: How to woo your local barista [13]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Human, Barista Raphael, Demisexual Raphael Santiago, Established Relationship, Fluff, Homoromantic Raphael Santiago, Idiots in Love, Insecure Simon, Literal Sleeping Together, M/M, Not Beta Read, Overthinking, Pansexual Simon Lewis, Sleepy Cuddles, Sleepy Raphael, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-30
Updated: 2016-08-30
Packaged: 2018-08-11 22:19:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7909738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaiseYourVoice/pseuds/mckvch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Simon bit his bottom lip and glanced at the sleeping form next to him, making sure he hadn't disturbed his lover's sleep. Raphael was curled up against his side, one arm slung over Simon's stomach and his face partly buried into the pillow. Even like this, with mussed up curls sticking up from his head and his mouth slightly open, he was by far the most beautiful sight Simon had ever laid eyes on. He knew it was cheesy as hell but he couldn't help it. The buzzing of his phone snapped his attention back to here and now, surprised he actually got a reply.</p><p><strong>From Clary</strong> [1:47] <em>Why do you always have to have your romance related existential crises in the middle of the night?</em></p><p><strong>To Clary</strong> [1:51] <em>I'm not having an existential crisis, thank you very much. And what do you mean "always"?! I never had an existential crisis in the middle of the night, only at humanly reasonable hours!</em></p><p><strong>From Clary</strong> [1:57] <em>You had one the night after Maureen asked you to be her prom date.</em></p>
            </blockquote>





	Stay. Sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> It's 4 am and I'm in one of those stupid phases when I can't fall asleep at reasonable hours (proper sleep is overrated, right?), so what else to do than write and post a new chapter. This one is a tiny bit shorter again, also kind of random but hopefully, you enjoy it anyway.
> 
> Also, very important: thank you very much to all of you adorable people who take the time to write a comment to this series and, of course, also thank you to everyone who doesn't comment but just reads and enjoys the story in silence ♥ You are all lovely and amazing! :D

**To Clary**  [1:34]  _When is the right moment to tell someone you love them?_

 **To Clary**  [1:35]  _And HOW do you tell them?? There's probably something like a "right moment"?_

Simon bit his bottom lip and glanced at the sleeping form next to him, making sure he hadn't disturbed his lover's sleep. Raphael was curled up against his side, one arm slung over Simon's stomach and his face partly buried into the pillow. Even like this, with mussed up curls sticking up from his head and his mouth slightly open, he was by far the most beautiful sight Simon had ever laid eyes on. He knew it was cheesy as hell but he couldn't help it. The buzzing of his phone snapped his attention back to here and now, surprised he actually got a reply.

 **From Clary**  [1:47]  _Why do you always have to have your romance related existential crises in the middle of the night?_

 **To Clary**  [1:51]  _I'm not having an existential crisis, thank you very much. And what do you mean "always"?! I never had an existential crisis in the middle of the night, only at humanly reasonable hours!_

 **From Clary**  [1:57]  _You had one the night after Maureen asked you to be her prom date._

 **From Clary**  [2:02]  _You woke me up in the middle of the night by calling me, panicking about how you agreed to be her date because you didn't want to hurt her feelings. But then you noticed that agreeing would give her the wrong impression._

He grimaced at the memory he had successfully repressed for almost four years. Back then he was still stuck with his crush on Clary and he absolutely hadn't known what to do when he realised that Maureen had a crush on him. In the end, he did go to prom with Maureen, drank too much of the spiked punch because of his own stupidity and because Clary had chosen to go to the dance with the King of jerks, Jace...whatever his last name had been. It kind of changed over the years multiple times because there had been some confusion about his descent but Simon never cared to learn about this. So, prom ended for him with being pretty drunk and waking up in a bed next to Maureen. Naked. Of course, he would have his first time while being wasted and couldn’t even remember any of it the day after. Welcome to the life of Simon Lewis, everybody.

 **To Clary**  [2:07]  _Okay. Point taken. It's not answering my initial question, though. How and when??_

 **From Clary**  [2:16]  _There is no proper answer, Simon, and you know this. You say it when the moment feels right and how?_   _...just say "I love you"? You don't need to make it a speech to declare your feelings._

Simon knew that, of course, he did. But despite his usually inept brain-to-mouth filter, he couldn't just blurt out a confession like this. It had to be  _right_. He didn't want to screw this up, say it at the wrong moment or even say it too soon into their relationship. Was it too soon for the 'big three words'? How would he know - this was his first relationship. And after already failing with his first time having sex, Simon really wouldn't be able to handle messing up the first  _I love you_  as well. Because this was much more important; this was with Raphael and he loved this boy too much to screw it up.

 **To**   **Clary**  [2:28]  _Yes, I know. But still...I have no idea how I'm supposed to know the right time or if we're even at a point in our relationship where it's okay to say it. I don't want to freak him out by maybe getting too serious with this? I don't know..._

He could almost hear his best friend sigh and Simon knew he was being difficult again, that he should drop it and let Clary go back to sleep, not bother her with his stupid little freak-out anymore.

"Simon...what're doin'?" The sleepy mumble pulled Simon back to reality and made him aware of the fact that his sleeping boyfriend was awake...or, well, in a partly-awake state where he was able to form slurred words and squint up at him with only one eye partly open. Simon's heart might have melted a little at the sight.

"Sorry, did I wake you? I can go into the living room," Simon offered in a whisper and the shock of mussed up curls was too inviting, he just had to gently dig his fingertips into the younger boy's dark mop of hair. Raphael leaned into the touch immediately, a sound close to purring barely audible from his slightly parted lips. He huffed softly, his head shifting to rest on Simon's thigh instead of the pillow and eyelid closing again.

"Stay. Sleep."

Simon smiled gently at the breathed words and it felt like his heart grew a little bigger in his chest at this whole scene. Raphael had been affectionate from the very beginning of their relationship but it had been in a cautious and slightly distanced way. Now, though, the younger boy was always seeking contact, curling into Simon whenever they shared the bed and he always seemed to drift closer during the day as well. It was as if he had become a magnet and only Raphael was affected by the pull, unable to keep the distance from the time they had just started dating. Simon felt his phone vibrate with a new message but he chose to switch off the too bright display without even looking at Clary's reply because his whole focus had shifted to the beautiful boy next to him.

Simon shifted a little, trying not to disturb his lover too much when he put his phone back on the bedside table and scooted into a lying position. Raphael made a sleepy, annoyed sound at Simon's movements and his arms wrapped around the elder's middle, forehead pressing against the other's shoulder. Simon almost didn't catch the muffled "You okay?" that almost got lost in the sleeve of his shirt.

"Yeah, just thinking a little too much again, is all," Simon replied softly and his fingertips found the sleep-warm skin of his lover's lower back, where his shirt had ridden up. His whole hand came to rest on the other's lower back, fingers fanned out and palm pressed against the soft skin. Raphael mumbled something else and Simon was pretty sure it was in Spanish but he couldn't understand a single word either way because the other was back to sleep the next second and he decided to follow suit. He would find the right timing and words to express his feeling properly because Raphael deserved so much more than a half-assed, spontaneous confession in the spur of the moment.


End file.
